Navigating through this season of having adult children can be quite challenging and sometimes disheartening as well.  It takes courage and wisdom because this uncharted territory of raising teens has more questions than answers.  This stage of having teenage and adult children who are independent and self-sufficient, which is a good thing, is less demanding in some ways because these adult children are very independent living out their lives as they should. We rejoice in their abilities and yet grieve because the simpler days of happy kids playing at home is gone forever.  Frankly, the sad truth is that our kiddos don’t need us that much anymore.  I guess this is the test of good parenting…the fact that one day you are out of a job. In light of this, the companionship that was an everyday thing is not always present, and the nagging question that haunts me at 3a.m. is one that has become a persistent prayer of mine.  Lord, how can these relationships with my sons be preserved?  How can my husband and I keep our family close and connected? Is it possible to keep the hearts of our precious children during this transitional time? Is the closeness that we once shared gone forever?

In the still of the night, my mind wanders and  I ponder…surely my children must have fond memories of  all of the happy ordinary homeschooling days as I do?  The days of learning to read and write…the days of picture books and then chapter books. The days of learning to swim and ride bikes without training wheels. The days of singing and dancing in the kitchen in the evenings while we waited for dad to come home. Cooking together, the laughter, the tears, the learning and discovering accomplished around the kitchen table.  These precious memories are ones that I want to continue making and yet I feel stymied these days.  I have not figured out how to relate to these young men in a beneficial and authentic way.  Is there a guide book for these unsettling years?  Is there a book for dummies that I may reference?  I’ve discovered on my own and from discussions with other parents that our older children often times do not even desire to walk down memory lane.  Although preserving  relationships is important to us parent types, our young men and women may not value this as much during their launching years.

Why is it that we often don’t want to  spend time with those people who cherish us the most in the world aside from God?  Don’t they want to share and talk about things with the folks who delight in them…who enjoy just hearing their voice…who are on their side….who are their advocates….their cheerleaders….their benefactors…their parents!!!

I have no answers these days. I used to have answers but life has made me insecure and I am not as confident as I was in my younger years.  This I know.  I have a friend who loves me. One who knows me completely.  A friend who watches over me and even knows what I am about to say before I say it!  As I was reading Psalm 139,  I thought about one who knows and cares about me more than I would ever care about my children.  As I delight in my children, my God delights in me.  As I guide and direct my children, He guides me.  As I wait patiently for my children to talk with me, my almighty God and friend waits for me to talk with Him.  Sadly,  I often do not want to talk to Him.  I neglect Him.  He knows me completely and knows all of my ways…my habits, my thoughts, my strengths and weaknesses. He knows when I lie down to rest, and when I awake, He is beside me .  He knows the number of hairs on my head.  He formed me in my Mother’s womb and chose my bones, my body type, my personality.  He walks with me everywhere.  I cannot escape from his love or concern.  He is interested in all I do.   This is too great for me to understand…it is too high!  Oh Lord forgive me for not talking to you as much as I should.  Oh Lord even more important than my relationship with my sons is our relationship. May that relationship be preserved forever!  How precious are your thoughts unto me O God!

How could a God who created all this be interested in little me? Amazingly, He is interested! As you view this video remember that you are loved  by a creator who cares about you so deeply that He knows the number of hairs on your head. He understands you, and knows when you rise and when you go to sleep.  He knows your strengths and weaknesses. He even knows what you are about to say before you say it!  He understands you because he created you and chose your eye color and your personality type. He desires to have a relationship with you and wants you to trust in Him.  He loves you so deeply. More than you or I will ever know.  He is an awesome and loving God. Trust Him today with your life!

I have a friend who called me one day to ask if she could sit at my house and do her paperwork.  How odd, I thought.  But sure, I replied. She had completed homeschooling and lived alone in her home. She said it was too quiet and she wanted to hear the noise of busy homeschool children. I thought it was a rather odd request but I sort of understand where she was coming from now a days. She missed her busy home. She missed her homeschool lifestyle.  She missed her relationships probably most of all.

Unfortunately,  I find myself still grieving the fact that I am no longer homeschooling.  The following is an “off the top of my head” very random list. This is purely cathartic for me and probably of little use to the reader. (not that many read these posts) Hopefully,  this will begin the process for me to re-evaluate and develop a new normal. Hopefully this will help me to discover what the Lord wants me to do now. Although I was not convinced at the time, my dear friend and homeschooling mentor warned me that those carefree happy homeschool days that were once a routine, will never return. She explained that  one may never go back to those happy childhood days.  Our kids become adults and these relationships, however precious do change.  Pining for the good ol’ days will not bring them back….she reminds me.  Still though, I need to come to some peace and closure.  I need to be grateful for this new season and look at the years to come with fresh hopeful eyes.  Indeed,  there is so much ahead especially with Christ.  But as it is written: “Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, Nor have entered into the heart of man
The things which God has prepared for those who love Him.” I Cor 2:9  What a comforting thought this is! ~ Anne

1. I miss reading and discussing good literature with my children and on occasion with my husband.

There is a sweet homeschool Mom at my church; a mother of many, who seems to have more clarity than most when it comes to homeschooling and raising up children. When possible I try to chat with her and glean just a few tidbits of advice from her.  What a blessing and encouragement  to have those folks in your life who are willing to share because they have traveled the road you are on and understand some of your worries and concerns. Their confidence and clarity helps you to have confidence as well. Sometimes I receive more from her than I would from attending any homeschool conference. The Bible reminds us women folk to do this very thing…to pass on and teach those good things.  We are to be models of godliness…of women who love their families and who are confident that God is working in the lives of their families.  I must confess, I’m not always the best example of godly confidence,  but I do know that God is faithful and He can be trusted with our lives and the lives of our precious children.

Last Sunday this dear Mom spoke just the words I needed to hear.   She said that “Life is real, but school is artificial.” She reminded me that school  does not prepare one for actual living.  School does not prepare one to care for a family….to love babies and grandparents.  School does not prepare one to walk through a devastating illness or other crises.  School does not prepare one to seek the Lord on a daily bases, to forgive and repent; to practice hospitality.  School does not prepare one to be helpful and handy around the home. It does not prepare one to shop wisely and keep to a budget. School does not prepare our daughters to be keepers at home or our sons to be spiritual leaders for their families. She reminded me that homeschooling is learning about real life.

I felt better just hearing those words because our homeschooling journey reflected more of this idea than the ideas in a scope and sequence chart from an Abeka catalog.  Our journey was less academic and more practical. Trying to strike a balance between following a structured academic program and allowing for normal family living, we fell somewhere in the middle. We ended up skipping the Latin program, but tore out the carpet instead.   We took a year off  around Junior high to work on life skills and growing up. Although I was always second guessing myself, I went with my instinct to practice moderation. I think it worked out okay.  Homeschooling is indeed about real life, and I’m so glad. 

The blessing of homeschooling has been that I have had many more hours with my precious children than I would have had if I enrolled them in government school.  More hours, more family meals together, more reading and cuddling, more hospitality with friends, more time at home just being together.  It’s been mostly very wonderful! 

It seems like yesterday I began homeschooling my boys; why didn’t someone tell me it would  be over so soon? The highschool years seemed to especially accelerate and slip through my fingers like sand as I desperately tried to make them last. Even though I’ve had more hours than most, it was not enough for me. There are so many lessons we never began…and so many wonderful books we never opened. It’s silly I know,  but I find myself actually grieving as if someone has passed away.  I’m one of those weird homeschool moms who spent nearly every waking moment thinking about ways to teach, train and disciple my children. How could I relate to them…connect with them better?  What should we learn next? What book should we read?  What are their strengths…their weaknesses?  What should we focus on next?  It’s not an easy task to simply turn this off after graduations.

I find myself in a new season now.  I’m more of a coach…still a cook and meal planner.  I have time to clean now, which is nice.  I’m able to spend more time with my dear mother-in-law who needs me more now. I’ve neglected areas in my life that I will now be able to catch up on.  I’m seeking the Lord, and asking for wisdom as always.  Praying for my family all the time and asking the Lord to help my young men to make wise choices, to walk with Christ and to live a life of integrity.  I guess life is this way…just as the Bible reminds us over and over again. “As for man, his days are like grass: as a flower of the field, so he flourisheth.  For the wind passeth over it, and it is gone; and the place thereof shall know it no more” Psalm 103: 15-16

Thank you for reading my thoughts!
 Read more...

I thought this video was interesting and better explains this agreement without all the panic and politics.  If we stayed in this program it would cost the USA more than any other country and China and India will not have to reduce emissions at all…in fact,  they will increase under this agreement.  As always the USA will give the most and lose the most. This plan if followed perfectly by the year 2100 MAY reduce the temperatures by 0.3 degrees. This is a push to redistribute wealth to the world and promote globalism. “I pledge allegiance to the world” is the idea behind this and it really is unscientific after all. Follow the money and we will probably understand the real motives behind it.  Let’s do our homework on this so we will be able to avoid the panic and group-think and hopefully discuss the issue with actual facts instead of politics and hysteria.

I’m finished homeschooling and I am so sad.  I loved homeschooling my boys. This song speaks to my heart and reflects what is going on now with my emotions.  I just graduated my second son from homeschool.

If you have a grateful heart this Thanksgiving…wonderful!  If not….listen to this song.

For most Americans the idea of legal immigration is a blessing.  We are a generous country and a melting pot that welcomes all.  Unless we are Native Americans, we all have a link to our mother country. Our ancestors came here hoping for a better life, seeking liberties that were oftentimes absent in our homes across the seas. Our grandparents wanted to become Americans and they were proud ones.  They never even called themselves “Irish-Amercans” or “Scottish-Americans” because they were simply Americans. My friends from Cuba remind me of this when they proudly speak of their new found freedoms in America; they are so very patriotic! 

My dear friend Emma is like this. We became friends talking to each other about our love for this country.  She values freedom more than most because she knows what it is like to live under a communist regime.  She understands the misery of not being able to practice her faith, or being told to spy on her neighbors.  She understands the sadness of poverty and the inability to improve ones circumstances under communism.  She is enraged when she sees some ignorant person wearing a Che Guevara Tee Shirt  because she knows the truth about this hipster icon; who was actually a mass murderer. She also knows that if she expressed this thought in Cuba she would have been arrested and sent to a work camp. Emma values freedom and God given liberties more than most Americans. She expressed some of her thoughts very sincerely in the following list. I asked her if I could post this on my website, I hope you will  understand her heart and come to realize as she has that our Country will be lost if we do not vote for and value freedom.

I feel compelled to tell my Facebook friends why I am voting Conservative.

1.  I already lived in a Godless country and don’t want to repeat the experience.

2.  It took my family 8 years to leave the country after the application date   including   8 1/2 months of forced work as a punishment for wanting to leave Cuba. I was 15 years old when they took me out of school to put me in this awful place; a work camp which was heavily guarded by the military.  Yes, I vote for LEGAL immigration because it is a privilege to live in this wonderful nation.

3.  I could have had siblings, but because  mother had several abortions, I am an only child.  I will always vote against killing the unborn,  It is murder and has been a great sorrow for me.

4.  My family left Cuba to have Freedom.  Freedom of speech, and religion…to be able to live in dignity, peace and liberty.  The liberal party does not value these freedoms.

5.I vote for the constitutional rights that our forefathers fought for.  Since I lived as all the Cuban people have for over 50+ years, without the right to vote for the president of the country, I will always practice this right. This country, that opened it’s arms to my family is the only beacon of light for people around the world.  I vote conservative because my love for what conservative represents.  I admire and respect all who have fought for it and those who still defend it at home or abroad.  Leaving my children and grandchildren a God loving country; a safe place to live and raise their families, where they can reach their goals and take advantage of the opportunities offered to them.  This is my priority as I approach the golden years. Yes, I am a conservative and I vote to have our values and principles be taught in schools for a better society, otherwise, the socialistic ideals of the progressive liberals will destroy the main fabric of this great nation.

God Bless us….God Bless America,

Emma

 Read more...

Dear Homeschool Families,

1.  Perhaps honesty is not an important value in our culture, however,  if one cares about a leader being truthful, supporting Hillary Clinton is not a reasonable choice for President.  Her manipulations and deceptions are so obvious and even though they are ignored by the left and also most media, they cannot be overlooked by the voter.  It’s interesting to me that when someone on the right is found to be a deceiver, they will suffer for it and will loose support.  But the left are loyal to their own; no matter how corrupt they are. Do your own research on this. Hillary lied about the Benghazi attack saying it was caused because of a video. She deceived the American people when she denied receiving any classified emails.  She even distorted the truth about arriving in Bosnia under sniper fire. All of this and more can be found easily as you do your own homework on Hillary’s fraudulence. Is she worthy of our trust now as she campaigns for President?

Although I have no babies waking me anymore, most nights around 3am, my eyes pop open.  It’s quite frustrating because I really want to feel refreshed in the morning after a wonderful undisturbed night of sleep.  But sleep is often  harder to come by these days…. and so I’m up thinking, walking around, drinking some water…and praying.  Actually, for some reason, I’m able to pray better at 3am. I’ve talked to others….especially other Moms who also are awake at this time.  Does the Lord awaken us all so that we will talk to him?

One night as I was praying, I was particularly worried.  Worried about everything.  My family, my children, my unsaved friends and relatives, my health, my husbands health, my siblings, our country and where it’s headed.  I could go on and on. All of my worries about the future seemed amplified as well…things seem much worse at 3 am; don’t they?  In the quiet, with only the hum of our ceiling fan, I heard from the Lord.  Well, I think it was Him. It was not an audible voice I heard…but a still small voice in my heart that said…”It’s not all about you.”   It was as if I got a glimpse of His glory…and I worshiped him and thought about his awesomeness.  I can’t really explain it, but for those few minutes I understood.  It’s not that we shouldn’t pray about things…we should.  But really this life is not about us.  It’s about HIM.  We are here to glorify Him. I found this magazine clipping that has been tucked in my Bible for years.  I thought it was so profound…and so beautiful as it describes what Pure Adoration means.

….the highest adoration is not occupied with the re-collection of favors received and mercies extended, though they do help one be aware of the true nature of God.  There is still, in all such recollection, a remnant of that self-centeredness which it should be the purpose of prayer to escape. In it, we are still thinking of God in terms of something done to “me” and for “me.”  We never really adore Him, until we arrive at the moment when we worship Him for what He is in Himself, apart from any consideration of the impact of His Divine Selfhood upon our desires and our welfare.  Then we love Him for Himself alone.  Then we adore Him, regardless of whether any personal benefit is in anticipation or not.  Then it is not what He has done for us or what we expect Him to do for us but what He has been from eternity before we existed, and what He is now even if we were not here to need Him, and what He will be forever whether that “forever” includes us or not-it is that which captivates us and evokes from us the selfless offering of self in worship.  That is pure adoration.  Nothing less is worthy of the name.

~From An Autobiography of Prayer by Albert E. Day

“The Goal of Socialism is Communism”-Vladimir Lenin

Our Public Schools, Colleges, and Universities have done an excellent job of converting our youth to the ideas of socialism and communism. Who would ever have believed that our America would have so many people willing to elect a socialist for President? Parents….please educate your children or they will be indoctrinated as well.